Today is a missing day.
Today we celebrate Thanksgiving with my side of the family.
My sister is here from out of town with her son, Jack. My brother's family lives here in town. So we will gather, 3 out of 4 of my mom's children (only 1 spouse... Leland's working, Tom, my sister's husband, didn't travel with them). "All" of my mom's grandchildren. Except of course, Seth.
And the kids will play together. And there will be laughter, and wine, and food, and games.
And if anyone else feels the absence of our youngest son, the youngest grandchild, the youngest nephew, no one will say anything.
As is usually the case, I will feel alone in my missing.
5 comments:
Kathryn, I'm sorry for that alone feeling in missing Seth. I deal with the no one saying anything, too. It can be such a struggle to not be angry at the silence of others. I am thinking of you as you remember your sweet little boy. Despite the unmet human expectations we face, God understands...and He never forgets. ♥
Kathryn ... I know exactly the feeling ... even my own hubby hasn't dared to mention my daughter this holiday season and while it hurts and I have cried every night this month (my daughter would be almost 9 months and old enough to look at the lights, eat some mashed stuff, and smile and giggle through all the laughter ... she won't be here with me ... I can only pray the lights in Heaven are brighter than I can ever imagine!!
That is why I try to mention someone's Angel whenever their name crosses my mind, so that they know they are not alone in missing or thinking of their child. My friend lost her son in June 2009, and we talk about him still, whenever she is sad and wants to talk, whenever I am thinking about him, I didn't know her at the time, we met shortly after, but I love her & her family & that includes Jayden, and I try to make sure she knows that. You are not the only one who misses Seth, they may just be afraid to mention it, some don't know if it's okay or not to talk about it, or are worried about bringing it up for fear of making you cry, then they sit there awkwardly. I know that if Kellie cries, it is not because she is upset that I brought it up, it is because she misses Jayden, but she has never told me she is uncomfortable with me bringing him up once in a while, she has in fact told me after that she is glad that she is able to talk to me about him, because her & her husband talk, but sometimes he isn't up to talking about Jayden, and that's where I come in. :) I will be remembering Seth and all of our angels on Thanksgiving. ♥
Kathryn,
My friend of over 30 years lost her oldest son three years ago this week. So now Thanksgiving is a "missing time" for her, too.
My heart and prayers go out to both of you this week. God be with you. ...Marsha Young
We shouldn't have to feel alone but sadly that's usually how it is...
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