Saturday, March 14, 2009

Headed home

Today we leave all this behind:

and head back to our frozen home.

Can I admit that I'm dreading a few things? The cold, for one. This has been such a warm vacation. The blue sky does so much for morale. At home, in March, the sky will be gray, the ground will be gray. Sigh.

I worry that people will assume/wonder/hope that I'm "all better now". Uh, not so much. Seth's birthday is less than two weeks away. I'm dreading getting home and feeling exactly the same as I did before we left. There. I said it. THAT is my biggest fear.

I know I won't feel exactly the same. For the truth is, I am not exactly the same. I have, again, seen God's provision and grace in ways that I used to only imagine. I continue to be a woman with hope. And now? I know that my kids have hope that our life will go on. That we will have fun again. For have fun we did!

If you know me, be patient with me. With us. As much as I wish this journey was shorter, I think we still have a ways to go.


Robynbeth said...

(((HUGS K)))

There is always hope.

Be safe on your journey home, and I am looking forward to further Disney stories.

With much love,

Evil Twin's Wife said...

{{{HUGS}}}. I hope Spring is just around the corner for us all, and while it may not heal any wounds, just the warm sun on your face can bring a bit of hope.

Lynnette Kraft said...

My heart goes out to you. I can personally relate to all the things you've mentioned. I'm not there anymore, but having been there, my heart is tender towards yours.

I want to encourage you that often the times before birthdays, before anniversaries and events, etc. are worse than the actual event, day, anniversary. I think it's because we are fearful - fearful that we won't be able to deal with it. I feared Anna's birthday SO much and was very depressed for 2 weeks. Then when the day came - God's grace and peace were present and it was actually a very sweet day.

God's grace will be sufficient for the day. I promise.

As far as people foretting - it's inevitable. People who haven't experience loss of that nature, truly can't understand. They don't know how long it takes and they don't feel your pain. So, don't worry about them - just tell them that you're still hurting if necessary and continue to turn to your loving and capable heavenly father for all that you need.

I wanted to thank you for praying for me. That is so precious and blesses my heart. I've been praying for you too Kathryn.

Now I even know better how to pray for you.